(an excerpt from The Progress Challenge by Dean Lindsay)

In 2010, most of us take on too many responsibilities, try to do too much, and even own too much.  Being too busy is a big source of stress in today’s get, get, get and go, go, go world.  Often, we are so chronically over-scheduled that we never give ourselves a chance to offer our best or to enjoy the moment. 

 Are your days fulfilling, or are they merely full?

It is possible that we could get more out of life by doing less. When we internalize the difference between full and fulfilling, we realize it’s not how many events we attend, activities we get involved in, or how much stuff we have that’s important.  We do not have to say “yes” to every demand on OUR time.  And we shouldn’t feel bad, since we are saying “no” to the event or project, not the person.

 Being busy can wear us out.  If we are committed to working and winning in this world of change, we must know our limits and not limit our NOs.

-  Consider your well-crafted goals and your schedule before agreeing to additional work.

-  Simplify – get rid of the clutter and baggage in your life and in your house.  Say NO to clutter.

-   Start your own Just Say NO campaign to regain quality time.  Review priorities and see if a request fits.  When you see things that waste time or hinder your progress, speak up.

-   Stop trying to make everyone happy. (We can’t do it anyway.) 

A polite way to say NO to a request for YOUR time:  “I’m quite committed.  I can be your backup, but please keep searching.”

Be Progress (not busy).

(2010′s BEST Stress Management Tip! – Say Yes to NO is an excerpt from The Progress Challenge by Dean Lindsay)

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As legendary director Mel Brooks said, “Humor is just another defense against the universe.”  Our minds can only focus on one thing at a time.  When we find the humor in a situation, it automatically relieves stress because the humor takes the place of stress, washing it away in waves of laughter and sometimes even rivers of tears.  Laughter is good medicine. 

Humor is a learned coping skill that improves with practice. When we laugh, similar to when we exercise, endorphins are released in the brain that help us feel better about the situation and offer more energy to tackle challenges. “Belly laughs” are also said to give our innards a good workout, massaging our organs while warming our hearts.  Touching, isn’t it?

“A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs – jolted by every pebble on the road.” – Henry Ward Beecher

Humor also happens to be profitable.  People are drawn to people who are upbeat and have a positive, jovial frame of mind.  Professionals who maintain a sense of humor gain respect.   Find what makes you laugh.  And be sure to laugh at yourself from time to time. 

What makes you laugh? 

Where is the humor in the situation?

Be Progress.

“When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘compared to what’?”
- Sydney Harris

In my work with sales and service organizations, the issue of stress is almost always front and center. I hear the horror stories from countless professionals in our workshops and in one-on-one coaching about how they feel overworked and overwhelmed (not to mention under appreciated and underpaid). How to deal with or relate to the stress of this high tech, low touch hyper-fast paced world is a vital, important and desperately needed topic to discuss. Is there a healthy Stress Pill?

I don’t mean to stress you out about stress but the crazy thing to consider is that WE are truly the ultimate cause of our own stress. It is our reaction to stressful stimuli that makes us ‘sick’, not the stimuli itself. We internalize to much of outside pressures which causes inside pressures.

This dear old world is full of ‘possible stressors’. Irate customers, indecisive prospects, spam, our slow computer, traffic, our kids, our co-workers, our co-workers’ kids, our families, our bosses and our employees all offer some of the nearly never ending stimuli to which we have the CHOICE of how to respond.

You control you.
You only control you.
Only you control you.
You control you only.

When we are stressed, we are choosing to respond to stimuli in a stressful way. I know this sounds simple. It is simple to understand (not always easy to act on but simple to understand). A major element in my company’s new success program, The Progress Challenge: Working and Winning, involves helping professionals take back control of their lives and careers by choosing to gain control of their thought processes and ultimately find ways to progress.

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”
- Marcus Aurelius

One major key is to know in advance positive ways to respond to the possible stressful stimuli. We need to keep a few Stay Cool Tools in our Life Tool Kits. Relieving stress is not the only key skill to master. Another vital and powerful skill is to relate to each stressor appropriately, so you do not have stress that needs to be relieved. Implementing “Stay Cool Tools” can be tough because they require practice and a new way of relating to stimuli.

“A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.”
- Aesop, Fables

Ask yourself these questions:

- What am I allowing to stress me out?
- How can I be prepared for the possible stressors?
- Where is the humor in the situation?
- Can I DO something about the situation? Bet you CAN and if you can … DO IT. If you can’t, you gotta find ways to accept it. (I know it’s not easy to accept stuff that bugs you or is just plain wrong but you know you should. Check this: Stress Can Kill You!)

Here are 10 Stress Pill Tips for Working and Winning from The Progress Agents’ Progress Challenge:

1.  Invest Time in relaxing.
Read a book, listen to music, Breathe. Breathe again.

2. Work to become more flexible in how you view problems and challenges.
Rigid thinking can cause stress.

3. Get 7 to 8 hours of sleep and try to get to bed at the same time each night.

4. Eat healthy food (whatever that is this week – I hear some veggies may still be good for you) Give your body the ‘Right Fuel’ for life’s challenges. You need energy (and not the quick sugar rush of a honey-glazed donut).

5. Be Assertive and Proactive to challenges.
Put Off putting off.

6. Keep lines of communication open.

7. Use the power of ‘No’.
You do not have to say ‘yes’ to every demand on YOUR time.

8. Cut yourself some slack. None of us are perfect.
Wouldn’t we feel weird and out of place if we were.

9. Have you heard about this new craze…They call it…
Please correct me if I am wrong… Regular exercise?
Of course you have and you know you feel better when you get a good workout in. I know it takes effort, time and some planning but even walking and light stretching feels good and can help you stay in control.

10. Practice Positive self talk.
Yes, I am talking about affirmations. When I realized that I was going to passionately encourage people to focus on affirmations, I admit I had nightmares of Stuart Smalley (Al Franken’s character from “Saturday Night Live”): “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.” Affirmations just seemed so wishy-washy, so flimsy. But I dug deeper and came to realize that we use affirmations all the time. It’s just that most of them are negative, stress causing and self-limiting:

“I can’t handle this.”
“I am stressed out.”
“I participate in road rage.”

Our brains are trippy and complicated and can do amazing things. But at their core our brains want one thing –To Be Right.

Whatever we continually say about ourselves and start to believe about ourselves, our brains are going to work to make it true. It is imperative that we be careful about the things we say to ourselves because…whatever you say to yourself, you’re right.

“Whether you think you can or think you can’t –
you’re right.”
- Henry Ford

Try using self-empowering affirmations and visualizations to create a more positive attitude about yourself and your relation to your surroundings.

Stuff like:

“I am in control and believe in myself.”
“Every day I make good decisions that positively
affect my life.”
“This is a really good article.”

Ladies and germs, there is a healthy Stress Pill.
The Stress Pill is YOU.

Be Progress.